Iced Tea Dialogue Gone Wrong

Dialogue #1

“Would you like some tea?”
“I would. Thank you.”
“Careful. It’s hot.”
“I usually prefer iced tea.”
“Mmm. I don’t have any.”
“Maybe I can put ice in this tea.”
“But that’s what I’m saying—I don’t have any cubes.”
“Sorry.”

“Honestly, if you rub it in one more time with your unnecessary, foolish sarcasm, I will punch you in the face. That's a promise.”
“Honestly bro, you have to calm down. So he was right, what's the big deal?”
“Whats the big deal? I'm lacking the stupid resource that's extremely vital in making your tea cold, leaving you helpless during a time of such anxiety and desperation, a time where icecubes have ceased to naturally exist due to the desperate gamble mankind has taken against mother nature's shenanigans. That's the big deal!”
“Honestly, it was Al Gore's fault to begin with. No one watches documentries.”
“Honestly, if you say honestly one more time, I won't only punch you in the face but I'll tickle you until you become unconscious and leave you in the sun to bake like old Uncle Earl's mudcream pie.”
“Look bro, it's over. If you can't honor your committment to me and give me enough attention like you do to the rest of your significant others, I don't think I can live in the same house as you, nevertheless even look at you for the rest of my life every single morning when I wake up and every single night, right before I go to sleep.”
“Who said I even wanted to look at you? I couldn't care less if you left buttercup!”
“UGH I REALLY DESPISE YOU. HAVE A NICE, CUBELESS LIFE YOU SOULLESS LITTLE RUNT. BYE.”